IDing the Flatlanders

You’re a Flatlander if:

• You’ve ever said, “We really should call the ACLU about this.”
• You ever based an argument on the phrase, “But they can afford a tax hike because…”
• You keep count of how many people you know in each racial or ethnic category.
• You think Ralph Nader makes a lot of sense.
• You think those greedy oil companies are holding solar energy back.
• You think the Great Society has actually worked.
• You don’t see the similarity between WONK and WANK.
• You think Ayn Rand is an African currency.
• Your house smells like a garbage dump because of your commitment to recycling.
• Your High School Year Book goals included the words “help people.”
• You think Carter should be on Mt. Rushmore.
• You believe personal injury lawyers when they say they are just trying to defend the little guy.
• You actually believe the NY Times and Washington Post.
• You know at least one Vegan.
• You’d rather own Birkenstock than Merck Stock.
• You think public housing is great, but just NIMBY.
• You think that Supply Side Economics refers to your dope dealer’s stash.
• You actually think that poverty can be abolished.
• You admire the Swedish welfare system.
• You know that Jefferson really meant to say “Entitled to Happiness.”
• You think the Flat Tax should be at 95%
• You go to Gay Pride Day parades so that no one will call you homophobic.
• After looking at your pay stub you still say, “America is under taxed.”

Does this sound like Chittenden County and Middlebury? You bet it does!

They have yet to figure out why people are leaving the state, the tax base is shrinking and the Legislature will not be able to balance the budget.