Stilton’s Place

Stilton’s Place

To Serve Americans

And some of us are ESPECIALLY good in taco bowls.

Mainstream media outlets are currently having screaming hissy fits over unsubstantiated reports that Donald Trump, noted lunatic, actually held a meeting with disgusting, potentially world-destroying Russian bastards and told them top secret anti-terror information which has only been widely reported in the world’s newspapers since last March.

This action is apparently the opening of the seventh seal, and the immediate cue for impending Armageddon, impeachment, or yet another humorless SNL skit for Alec “Duck Lips” Baldwin.

Owing to the fact that we don’t believe anything from the Left-leaning media these days, we find it very hard to get excited about all of this. However, in the interest of at least trying to understand the Liberals’ mindset on all of this, we’ve invented a fun game – and you can play along!

From now on, when you hear a story about Trump and the Russians, celebrate the word “Martians.” And go ahead and imagine they’re really bad ass Martians who want to eat our brains, defile our women, and get their own special restrooms. Now we can have all the terrifying fun the Lefties seem to be enjoying!

Although we shouldn’t make light of this very, very serious situation. Is it possible that Trump is babbling state secrets in an irresponsible manner? Hell yes! But is it worse than the way Hillary protected state secrets? Not so much.

Of course, we should take seriously the threat from the actual Russians. It was they, after all, who grabbed the DNC emails and shared them with Wikileaks, causing Hillary to lose the election, right? I mean, even lacking any evidence that it happened, we all KNOW it’s the truth because it’s been reported so often. But…

Now there’s a new wrinkle. It seems that rather than the big bad Russians, the DNC emails may actually have been sent to Wikileaks by a DNC staffer named Seth Rich who turned up mysteriously dead soon after the leaks were made public. Well, maybe not that mysteriously…

Dirty Hillary.

It seems fairly sure that Rich sent over 40,000 emails to Wikileaks – perhaps hoping to head off a presidency by a hopelessly corrupt Clinton crime syndicate. And according to a private investigator, police were told to “stand down” from investigating the murder (described as a “botched burglary” since the gunman had no interest in money or personal belongings).

Is the story true? We have no idea – but it has a LOT more credibility than the accusations being made against Trump. And certainly is more deserving of a special investigation than anything the President has been accused of doing.

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