Stilton’s Place

Stilton’s Place

And On The Lighter Side…

The most important and incomprehensible story in today’s news is the release of the Republicans’ plans to kinda sorta replace Obamacare with something which seems just about as complicated and convoluted, but will save billions in tax dollars for the evil rich by declaring “mass graves for the poor” to be a legitimate medical option.

At least, that’s how the ever-rabid mainstream media is reporting it. Seriously, the Holocaust got more favorable press coverage. We’re guessing the actual plan is significantly less draconian than it’s being portrayed and, at least possibly, better than the current system which is crumbling before our eyes (as it was meant to do by the Democrats).

With nothing else to say on the topic just yet, we’ve decided to look at “the lighter side” of the news – by which we mean the stories which we’d like to take a lighter to, if not an actual flamethrower. Starting with…

Contrary to a number of bone-headed tweets, Donald Trump has now admitted that he has no secret tapes of his conversations with fired FBI Director James Comey.  Despite this, we don’t believe Trump was lying. We believe, as we always have, that the guy is at least sporadically nuts.

We also wonder, under the GOP health care plan, what a double thumbectomy would cost – because we know a certain Twitter addict who could really, really use one.

And speaking of Oval Office residents, we found this story interesting…

LA would be renaming a 3 mile stretch of Rodeo Road, which makes us hope passionately that the rodeo clown who infamously wore an Obama mask while dodging bulls will do the ribbon-cutting.

By the way, let us be quick to distance ourselves from the racially insensitive joke told above by our ersatz Nick and Nora Charles. We can only guess that they were under the evil influence of coffee at the time…

According to a scientific study which was, in a glaring bit of oversight, not funded by our tax dollars, researchers determined that psychopaths are more likely to prefer their coffee black.

Which is really only logical; if you dawdle around in Starbucks waiting endlessly for your barista to make a Veni-Vini-Vici-sized half-foam hazelnut creme arabica cappuccino with sprinkles and a dusting (“Only a dusting!”) of nutmeg, it gives the cops way too much time to catch up with you.

Which isn’t why we prefer our coffee black. We just like something that matches our mood in the morning.

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