Posted on February 6, 2017 by Ed G. Mann Ps.D
Posted on January 27, 2017 by Ed G. Mann Ps.D
Jonathan is talking to his friend Joshua.
“I hear that you’ve just bought your very first computer, Joshua. How are you getting on with it? Have you tried out Google yet?”
“I don’t need to use Google,” replies Joshua.
“Really?” says Jonathan. “So why is that?”
“Because my wife Rachel knows everything,” replies Joshua.
Filed under: Humor | Tagged: Better times, Enlightenment, Individualism, Jewish Humor, Loons, Thinking right | Leave a comment »
Posted on January 25, 2017 by Ed G. Mann Ps.D
Some Phyllis Diller Quotes:
- Whatever you may look like, try to marry a man your own age because as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.
- Housework can’t kill you, but why take a chance?
- The reason why most women don’t play football is because 11 of them would never want to wear the same outfit in public.
- The best way to get rid of kitchen odors is to eat out.
- A bachelor is a guy who never made the same mistake once.
- I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford, then I want to move in with them.
- Most children threaten at times to run away from home. But fortunately this is the only thing that keeps some parents going.
- We spend the first 12 months of our children’s lives teaching them to walk and talk, and the next 12 years telling them to sit down and shut up.
- Burt Reynolds once asked me out. I was in his room.
- My photographs don’t do me justice – they just look like me.
- I admit that I have a tremendous sex drive. My boyfriend lives 40 miles away.
- Tranquilizers only work if you follow the advice on the bottle – Keep away from children.
- The reason why the golf pro tells you to keep your head down is so that you can’t see him laughing.
Filed under: Humor | Tagged: Better times, Enlightenment, Freedom, Individualism, Jewish Humor, Loons, Thinking right | Leave a comment »
Posted on January 20, 2017 by Ed G. Mann Ps.D
Posted on January 16, 2017 by Ed G. Mann Ps.D
A group of seniors were sitting around at the Coffee Shop talking about all their ailments.
“My arms have got so weak I can hardly lift this cup of coffee,” said one.
“Yes, I know,” said another. “My cataracts are so bad, I can’t even see my coffee.”
“I couldn’t even mark an “X” at election time because my hands are so crippled,” volunteered a third.
“What? Speak up! What? I can’t hear you,” said an elderly lady.
“I can’t turn my head because of the arthritis in my neck,” said one, to which several nodded weakly in agreement.
“My blood pressure pills make me so dizzy!” exclaimed another.
“I forget where I am, and where I’m going,” said another.
“I guess that’s the price we pay for getting old,” winced an old man as he slowly shook his head.
The others nodded in agreement.
“Well, count your blessings,” said a woman cheerfully. “Thank God we can all still drive.”
Filed under: Humor | Tagged: Alte kackers, Better times, Enlightenment, Freedom, Jewish Humor, Loons, Thinking right | Leave a comment »