Ponder this

When businesses affirmatively like regulations, that’s when to reach for your wallet.

~ Timothy Noah

Toon in

Toon in

Sunday Toon

Sunday Toon

Stilton’s Place

Stilton’s Place

Many Unhappy Returns

Let joy be unconfined.

Bells are ringing, birds are singing, and nubile maidens frolic and gambol while tossing rose petals into the air! And that’s only a short list of the wonderful things that aren’t happening (but should) now that we’ve finally finished and filed our blankety-blanking federal taxes.

Instead, we simply feel a sense of weary and melancholy accomplishment, in much the same way we’d feel if we survived a gangbang in a prison shower and knew that it wasn’t for the last time.

As mentioned here on Monday, there was no way the 2016 Turbotax program was going to run on our ancient (2008) Mac this year, so we ended up having to do everything using Turbotax’s online site. Which was actually fine, as long as you don’t mind spending $115 to wade through the government’s indecipherable crap, put all of your most sensitive personal information online, and end up having no idea whatsoever if the final result is anything even marginally like correct.

Fortunately, the IRS provides a free service to help you sort everything out later. It’s called an “audit.”

Owing to this time (and sanity) consuming activity, we don’t really have any trenchant political commentary for you today, other than to once again express our disgust with the whole system…and the legal requirement that we have to fund this madness.Bells are ringing, birds are singing, and nubile maidens frolic and gambol while tossing rose petals into the air! And that’s only a short list of the wonderful things that aren’t happening (but should) now that we’ve finally finished and filed our blankety-blanking federal taxes.

Instead, we simply feel a sense of weary and melancholy accomplishment, in much the same way we’d feel if we survived a gangbang in a prison shower and knew that it wasn’t for the last time.

As mentioned here on Monday, there was no way the 2016 Turbotax program was going to run on our ancient (2008) Mac this year, so we ended up having to do everything using Turbotax’s online site. Which was actually fine, as long as you don’t mind spending $115 to wade through the government’s indecipherable crap, put all of your most sensitive personal information online, and end up having no idea whatsoever if the final result is anything even marginally like correct.

Fortunately, the IRS provides a free service to help you sort everything out later. It’s called an “audit.”

Owing to this time (and sanity) consuming activity, we don’t really have any trenchant political commentary for you today, other than to once again express our disgust with the whole system…and the legal requirement that we have to fund this madness.

Stilton’s Place

Stilton’s Place

Uncomfortably Numbers

There are plenty of newsworthy things to talk about today, including radical Islamic terror, the impending (or not) House vote on Obamacare repeal, Trump’s surveillance accusations, mainstream media burying the story of illegal aliens raping a 14 year-old girl in a school bathroom, and Chuck Schumer declaring that the Democrats will filibuster Neil Gorsuch’s nomination for Supreme Court Justice in hopes of being rewarded with 72 virgins in the afterlife.

And why aren’t we talking about these juicy topics? Because instead of keeping up with the news, we’ve spent the entire day working on our freaking taxes.

And we aren’t even up to working on the actual, impenetrably baffling tax forms yet – a task which must be postponed until we’ve made a run to the liquor store. Rather, we’re still at the beginning of the process, doing our once-a-year data entry of receipts into an ancient accounting program that we don’t clearly remember how to use anymore.

As Life’s grand parade passes us by, we’re sitting scrunched at a desk squinting at every credit card charge, cancelled check, and crumpled receipt which passed through our underpaid hands in 2016…then peck-peck-pecking the numbers on a keyboard, hands cramping, until we want to scream.

The whole process is a white hot pain in the rear, but it’s very important to make sure that everything in our tax return is completely accurate and above board. Because 12 years from now it’s entirely possible that an older but no wiser Rachel Maddow may be waving our returns at a TV camera. [snip]