Hope n’ Change

Let Us Spray


They took away our soap-on-a-rope when we made a little noose.

Today marks the first day of early voting in Texas, and Hope n’ Change had no intention of letting the opportunity to vote against Hillary Clinton slip by.  Oh sure, we could have waited for Election Day, but what if we were hit by a bus, a meteor, or an assassin employed by the Clinton Family Foundation?

Right up until the last minute, we had extreme reservations about voting for Trump. The man is a disaster of the first order – but at least there’s a scintilla of hope that he might head a worthwhile team. And even if he doesn’t, at least it’s a relatively safe bet that he would be a highly disruptive force in a political/moral quagmire which desperately needs disruption.

In order to cast our vote, we had to ask ourselves if there was anything imaginable which might come out in the next couple of weeks that would keep us from voting for Trump over Hillary. And the answer is no. He would have to be proved responsible for raping more women, causing more deaths, extorting more funds, revealing more national secrets, and forging more secret alliances with America’s sworn enemies than the Clintons have. Frankly, we don’t think that’s even theoretically possible.

Additionally, we wanted to vote early to show our resentment for the way the media has conducted itself during this election cycle. Every day, new scandals are coming out about Hillary (any one of which would sink most candidates) but they’re quickly buried by the mainstream media. Instead, we’re given sensationalistic news stories about a female porn star coming forward to accuse Trump of offending her womanly sensibilities by giving her a quick hug and a kiss over a decade ago.

Oh, please. This is a woman whose theatrical specialty is [CAUTION: you may want to skip directly to the next paragraph. Be warned that you can never un-read the following words] something called an “anal creampie.” And we’re supposed to believe that this gentle flower is still having nightmares about getting a kiss from Donald Trump?! Unlike her seamy day job, at least a quick peck from the Trumpster won’t make it impossibly painful for her to ride a unicycle.

Enough is enough.

This is not the election we hoped to see in 2016, and these are damn sure not the candidates we wanted to choose between. Even after 8 years of Barack Hussein Obama, we took no real pleasure in casting our vote…other than imagining the horror-stricken faces of those on the Left if Trump somehow wins.

If that happens, liberals will finally know the pain that we have felt for 8 long years. And know why we don’t ride unicycles.

The Millennials


Day by Day


Ponder this

Europe was created by history. America was created by philosophy.

~ Margaret Thatcher

Jewish Humor

Calling a Jewish mother

The phone rings………………..

Jewish Mother: “Hello?”
Daughter: “Hi Mummy. Can I leave the children with you tonight?”

JM: “So tell me – you’re going out?”
D: “I wouldn’t be asking otherwise, would I?”

JM: “Then I need you to tell me who are you going out with.”
D: “With a friend, mummy, just a friend.”

JM: “I’ll never understand why you left your lovely husband. Such a nice man.”
D: “I didn’t leave him, mummy. He left me!”

JM: “You let him leave you more like, and now you’re going out with these anybodies and nobodies.”
D: “I do not go out with just anybody. Can I bring the kids over please?”

JM: “I never used to leave you to go out with anyone, unless with your father.”
D: “There are lots of things that you used to do that I don’t!”
JM: “What are you hinting at?”
D: “Nothing mother. All I want to know is, will you have the kids to stay over tonight?”

JM: “You’re staying the night with him even? What will your husband say if he finds out?”
D: “My EX Husband!” There’s no way he’ll be bothered – from the day he left me he’s probably never slept alone, even if he’s had to pay for it.”

JM: “So you’re planning to sleep over at this loser’s place?”
D: “He’s not a loser!”

JM: “A man who goes out with a divorced woman with children is a loser and has no principles. Next you’ll be telling me he’s black & not even Jewish!”
D: “Look mother, I don’t want to argue. Am I bringing the kids over or not?”

JM: “Those poor children, with such a mother and no stability. No wonder your husband left you!”

JM: “Don’t you dare scream at me. It wouldn’t surprise me if you scream at the loser too!”
D: “So now you’re worrying about the loser?”

JM: “Ah, so you’re admitting it. He is a loser. I spotted it immediately.”
D: “Well that’s it! Goodbye mother.”

JM: “Wait!. Don’t hang up. When are you bringing them over?”
D: “I’m not bringing them over. If you must know, I’m not going out!”

JM: “So tell me, if you’re going to carry on not going out like this, how can you ever expect to meet anyone?”

Toon in




The DDOS that took place a couple of days ago ought to wake up some folks as to what could happen during our election.
Not the actual voting but the reporting of results during which the major networks are shut down in a pattern than prevents reporting of on a regular basis. TV may be able to push out a signal as can radio, but any medium transmitting data over the web will be at a loss.

Attacks on the internet keep getting bigger and nastier

[snip] On Friday, epic cyberattacks crippled a major internet firm, repeatedly disrupting the availability of popular websites across the United States. The hacker group claiming responsibility says that the day’s antics were just a dry run and that it has its sights set on a much bigger target. And the attackers now have a secret weapon in the increasing array of internet-enabled household devices they can subvert and use to wreak havoc. [snip]


Like with other online attacks, the motivation behind DDoS attacks is usually mischief or money. Attackers have shut down websites in the past to make political statements. DDoS attacks have also been used in extortion attempts, something that’s been made easier by the advent of Bitcoin.

For its part, a member of New World Hackers who identified themselves as “Prophet” told an AP reporter via Twitter direct message exchange that collective isn’t motivated by money and doesn’t have anything personal against Dyn, Twitter or any of the other sites affected by the attacks. Instead, the hacker said, the attacks were merely a test, and claimed that the next target will be the Russian government for committing alleged cyberattacks against the U.S. earlier this year.

“Twitter was kind of the main target. It showed people who doubted us what we were capable of doing, plus we got the chance to see our capability,” said “Prophet.” The claims couldn’t be verified.

The collective has in the past claimed responsibility for similar attacks against sites including ESPNFantasySports.com in September and the BBC on Dec. 31. The attack on the BBC marshalled half the computing power of Friday’s attacks.